Thursday, November 1, 2012

Why I Hesitate to Leave the House

I have an incredible husband.

Contrary to my first opinion of him, he is very creative.

Almost...dare I say it....artistic.
He took this picture.

Need I say more?

He calls rugs, "floor blankets".
He is amazing at mixing cliches and says things like:
"We'll cross that bridge when we burn it."
He unconsciously created an incredible mental image when he grafted "You're trying to get my goat" and "Get off my back" into,
"Get off my goat."

He melded "Don't boast" and "Don't toot your own horn" when he told Grant,
"Don't boast your toot."
Which being a male, also was applicable.

So, I am used to these kind of things.
I know, that if I send him out for ice cream, he is very likely to come home with 19 half gallons.
This my friends, is the honest truth, I am not exaggerating,
He is just rather incredible.

because of this.....
I always hesitate just a little to leave home.
NOT because I don't trust him....
but because of that crazy creative streak.

I came home from harp last night pleased to see that the younger kids had been bathed.
I commented on their wet hair and Rowan replied,
"Yeah, Dad let us take a bath with Gypsy! He took pictures!"
This was a blow.
It never crossed my mind that Dave might be tempted to bathe children and puppy together.
I turned on the camera with trepidation.
It was all too true. There was Rowan in a washrag loincloth and his puppy. In the bathtub.
Dave told me the loincloth was not as much for modesty as to protect the goods from a hungry pup.   
When I questioned him on the wisdom of this arrangement, he brushed it off with a,
"Well I needed to do a flea shampoo...."
I walked away.

Really between my Jewish Mother and my Creative Husband,

I feel normal.

1 comment:

  1. Oh, Annie. I needed a laugh this week. Thank you, thank you. (If you're normal, I must be comatose.) My dad is notorious for grafting and warping cliches, too. We keep a notebook.



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