Friday, June 14, 2013

What would I do without you?

Her voice floats down the stairs. The sweetness of it falls upon me like a warm hand, like a benediction.
"What would I do without you Mama?"
It's a rhetorical question. It doesn't require an answer because the answer is obvious.
The real question is, what would I do without her. Without all of them.
My in-laws took the kids to their cabin for three days last week.
Dave and I slipped back into patterns for two. Long walks with the dog before dinner. Dinner consisting of scrambled eggs and sausage. Gardening. Going out at night.
As if the last 13 years of parenting never were. Well, almost.
The truth is, my husband of 16 years is infinitely dearer to me because of the way I've seen him love our children.
My mind is more alive and interactive with his conversation than it used to be because I've learned to listen to frog stories and bird-watching details.
I am much much more appreciative of silence.
I see beauty as my children would. They've opened my eyes to things I've never noticed, never known existed.
The knowledge of them, of the gift of them, has produced a divine gratefulness in my soul, I am utterly thankful.
So our time alone together, was the old, with a new flair.
And when our kids came back, well, my cup overflowed. Because to hold them in my arms, their warm bodies wrapped close, is like a benediction. A warm hand of blessing upon my head.
I am utterly thankful.

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